“Dear we need to spice up our love life a bit.”

“You and your plans. Spill. Directly. What perverse idea do you want me to take part in? You, my friend, will never be satisfied.”

“Arrey hear me out. How about – once a year, we keep an ownership day? You own me one day and I own you one day. You could do whatever you want on that day to me and with me. We needn’t think about each other’s pleasure or pain that day, and whatever happens that day stays on that day, and doesn’t affect our regular life. I could say I want 2 blowjobs in a day or I could tell you to come to the mall with me without wearing a bra or panties or I could tell you to bend over so that i could fuck you whenever I wish. What do you think?”

“Haha I like the idea. And I could do whatever I want to you or with you as well? Say I want a threesome with another man, then?”

As long as I am involved in some way. You would own me, remember?”

“The first thing I would do is to tell you to eat lauki. Then I will tell you to sleep on the couch. Think about it and then commit. I am game for it.”

Anything. Anything at all. As long as I am there.”

“Isn’t that a condition? Say I want to lock you in a room and take away your phone and go shopping alone with my friends. Then?”

Ok no conditions whatsoever. Do as you please, meri mata. I am sure you won’t do anything i hate simply because you know I will have my turn too. Badlaaaa!!”

She giggled.

“Haha ok. Let’s see. Tomorrow? Or rather today evening 9 pm to tomorrow evening 9 pm?”

I could see her mind whirring in her eyes, the gears kicking in place. She had something wicked in mind already. I admit I was half flustered by her examples, realising only later that my idea was only related to sex – and my mind was now full of unpleasant things she could ask me to do – what if she asked me to clean the attic and wash the cars the whole night?

Fuck it. We’ll see. My turn will come.

“Bye dear. See you at 9 now. I am going to work. We’ll directly start – but I can say quit if I want to, right?”

“No, you cant. Not if you want your turn. Don’t worry, I think you’ll like what I have in mind for the evening.”

It was almost 8.30 when I was done with work, i had kept the next day free in anticipation. Rarely had she agreed to one of my ideas so readily. I decided to keep driving in circles till it was 9 pm and ring the bell at sharp 9, hoping to see her in a tight black leather dress with a whip in hand or handcuffs or something similar. She’d look stunning in it, wouldn’t she? And from where did that threesome idea crop up? If she got someone for a threesome, who could it be? I admit I thought there was a bit of a cuckold in me, the thought of my partner fucking and sucking someone else right in front of me was terribly arousing, but I hoped she wouldn’t ask me to DO anything to a man. No, no. That would be terrible. But wasn’t I always fantasizing about a woman sucking her nipples? Why wouldn’t she fantasize about a man sucking my dick or vice versa? Eeeks. That would be just torture, wouldn’t it? Besides, where would she find a safe man who didn’t belong in our social circle, who could be so trustworthy or discreet? Probably a male escort, but how could she find someone at such a short notice?

My mind was making tale after tale after tale, and I could feel my heart thumping. It’s the unknown and the unknowable which is the main source of pleasure and pain, isn’t it?

In my imaginary flight, I didn’t notice how I was standing outside the door of my own house, staring at the watch.

It was time.

She opened the door in a flash as if she was waiting for me in the other side.

“Oh, it’s you.”

Her face looked a bit surprised and crestfallen. She wasn’t dressed in leather, she had put on a black off shoulder evening dress, her brown hair in gorgeous curls, and she had done something to her eyes and eyelashes that made them look like tiny little jewels in the night sky. She was wearing stilletoes as if about to leave for a party.

“Aren’t you early?”

“No it’s 9. Why? Who were you expecting? Are you going somewhere?”

“Haha no. But yes, someone’s coming. You’ll find out soon enough. In the meantime, I’ve put the chicken in the microwave. Take care to not overheat it. And when in tell you, go and get hot naan from the downstairs restaurant please? Desserts in the fridge and we prefer wine before dinner.”

“Oh I see what you are doing. You know I don’t like wine and chicken, but ok.”

“Who said anything about you?”

I pointed at the table set for 2 and the cutlery.

“Oh that. That’s not for you. You’ll eat in the kitchen. Your daal rice is in the fridge. And no, not a drop of alcohol for you.”

“Then who’s the guest eh? What’s my role, that of a maid? That’s my punishment?”

“Why maid? You never thought of me as a maid when one of your friends turned up for dinner and I set up and served the food? You aren’t a maid, you are my partner. It’s just that I thought it better to not have any maid for these 24 hours at home so that we could have total freedom.”

“Who’s we here?”

“You, me and -”

At that instant the doorbell rang.

“Here he is. See for yourself. No need to rush, i’ll open the door.”

‘He’ turned out to be one of her really old friends from college days. Samar, his name was – one of those tall slim fair men, with short hair done in the latest spike fashionwho wear those satiny shirts that cling to their shoulders setting them off and showing all their gym work. I often teased her about him in the early days of our relationship, since they looked so good together in photos. She had told me they had had a short fling but he had a steady girlfriend and they moved to Melbourne. I often asked her how he was in bed and what did they do together – but she shrugged it off.

Looks like today I was going to find out.

“Hi samar. I think we have never met”

“Yes I know you through Facebook. You are in all her pictures!! Gosh you are looking gorgeous Ina. Even better than your pictures. Even better than in college. It’s so nice to see you. ”

“Same here. Gosh you seem to have been working out everyday” She went and pressed a finger on his shoulders with a wink and he playfully pushed her away, and I noticed that their fingers remained entwined for a few moments more than normal.”

“You live in Melbourne, don’t you?”

“Yes. The moment I saw his check-in from the Melbourne airport today morning on Facebook, I messaged him about your plan. We had talked something like this once, when we were young and naive and promised each other to remain sporting forever. So he graciously agreed without any questions. He was a bit hesitant at first, but when I told him you’ll provide for his first class flight tickets and his stay in India, he knew you were serious about the idea.”

“But he’s married, isn’t he?”

“Exactly. He’s happily married, aren’t you? That’s the beauty of your plan. He’s such a trustworthy person anyway – but he’ll keep this to himself since his wife doesn’t know.”

“So shall we have dinner?”, she asked.

“Oh no no no no. Ina, I dont think I want to wait that long, I don’t think I can.”

With that he pushed her against the wall of our living room next to the portrait of Krishna and and started madly hungrily kissing her, his hands directly sliding between her legs with abandon while she folded one leg and wrapped it around him and her arms pulled him closer as if she was starved of sex since ages and I wasn’t even around.

I very much was. I was a spectator, shell shocked, flabbergasted, almost sweating profusely, wondering what I had willed on myself. Was it a threesome? Was I supposed to be a naukar? How far will they go? Was I invited?

It was my house and my partner and I damned well wasn’t going to be left out. I went close to where they were kissing, and tried to touch her back with my fingers.

They stopped as soon as she felt my touch.

“Ina you didn’t say it was going to be a threesome. I get totally turned off if I see another guy naked. What’s wrong? ”

“Shhhh chill samar. No it isn’t a threesome. Pratik – we shall allow you to stay here and watch. You were asking me how it was with him, no? I figured you’d prefer someone I’ve already slept with and safe. Make what you make of it, whether it’s a reward or a punishment. But tonight I am not your partner. Stick to your word. We’ll pretend you aren’t there. I’ve a feeling you’ll enjoy it.”

And almost as if I wasn’t there, she turned around and started unbuttoning his shirt with an urgency I had never seen before in her. His hands were roaming all over her, and his mouth was hungrily gobbling away at her neck.

I felt a wave of anger creep in at this humiliation. But I couldn’t fault her. It was my idea, she was giving me exactly what I thought I wanted. Being owned isn’t a term to be thrown around lightly. And i had thrown it around. Without thinking it through. Without attaching that asterisk. Please read the offer document before investing or your money will be lost. And not just money.

There’s a fetish in porn industry which is an exclusive male fetish. Men who love to watch their partners getting fucked by other men. They call it that by that derogatory unmanly name – cuckold. Whenever I had thought of the idea, it had always involved me getting in the action at some stage, not just lonely, in my own house, watching a live porn movie starring my own partner with a man I always wondered about and envied. Here I was – reduced to a caricature in a porn movie – a cuckold.

They say that in sex, humiliation, if done just right, is one of the biggest turn-ons. Her dress was on the floor before I knew it. She was being ravaged and enjoying every bit of it while I stood like a statue, moving just a little bit to get a better view of her body. It was as if I was looking at her body for the first time, the clean lines of her back, the collarbones, the soft thighs like milk, those feet with long violet nails, that lingerie which I had bought for her now being touched and caressed by a total stranger right in front of my eyes. I tried to catch her eye to find a wink or a twinkle, acknowledging the game and the joke but she was as if oblivious to my presence. 

Suddenly she held his finger and drew him to the bedroom. Our bedroom. They passed me without so much as an acknowledgement but I followed like a dog following a bone. She thumped and sat on the bed in one motion, turned him around and started unbuckling his trousers with an unbecoming haste while he stood in front of her caressing her hair.

The belt was on the floor and his trousers unbuttoned and on his ankles. He had such a better body than me, this man Samar. Muscles rippling on his back and a tight ass which she was cupping underneath his Calvin Klein briefs.

In a swoop he had pushed them down to join the trousers and thrust his rock hard dick near her mouth. He was waiting. Eager. Hungry.

I was dreading the pleasure on her face as she stroked his dick with her hands, drew tiny circles on the head with her tongue as if to taste it and expertly took it in. They say no woman really enjoys giving head but there was no sign of discomfort on her face at all. I knew it. I knew her face intimately like the back of my hand. She was into it. She was massively turned on. Here was my lovely wife with the cock of another man in her mouth plunging in and out, in lingerie I gifted her, on my bed, in my house. I felt as if I was in a movie, and not yet sure whether it was a dream or a nightmare. They say in hindu mythology that Vishnu moves around in the sky randomly screaming tathastu tathastu and at that exact moment if you wish something, it comes true. He doesn’t discriminate between dreams and fantasies and nightmares, he just delivers what you wished for, without any asterisk, without any conditions applied, exactly what you wished for. They say you should be careful of even your thoughts, not just your words and your actions – because no one knows which thought spawns reality at which moment.

She went on. I watched. He plunged. I watched. She sucked. I watched. He moaned. I watched. He pushed her head in by grabbing her hair. I watched. She had pleasure in her wide open eyes. I watched. There were tears coming out of the corner of my eyes. I watched.

He didn’t last long. He jizzed all over her bra. Small mercy, she didn’t spit or swallow, he came out before he came in her mouth.

There wasn’t even a moment’s pause. This wasn’t a porn movie where you could pause after jerking off or browse to the next video. This was reality, there was no respite from the next scene.

“Your turn baby.” She said while climbing up the bed and resting her head on our white pillow, spreading her legs and gently pushing her panties to one side.

Our eyes met.

“Enough. I changed my mind.” I said.

“Enough. I changed my mind too. You aren’t sticking to your word and maybe it’s too pleasurable for you to watch. You cant. Go out. Wait near the door. Listen to our moans and wonder what’s going on. That should set you right. Now GO!!! ”

She was mad at me or was she? I would only know when the nightmare would end. It was 11 pm, there were 22 hours to go, goodness knows what else was in store, what pain or pleasure or humiliation.

But it was too much to resist.

I obeyed. I walked out. Slumped outside the door while she moaned o baby yessss aaah. I knew what he was doing while I sat in the verandah. I knew what was going to happen next. And after that. And after that.

I took a deep breath, head crouched between elbows and knees.

And sobbed like a baby.